Kevin and Mona Lee Feehan shared moments from their 39-year marriage at World Marriage Day in St. Albert Feb. 8.

WCR PHOTO | RAMON GONZALEZ

Kevin and Mona Lee Feehan shared moments from their 39-year marriage at World Marriage Day in St. Albert Feb. 8.

February 23, 2015
RAMON GONZALEZ
WESTERN CATHOLIC REPORTER

The love of a man and a woman committed to an exclusive and permanent relationship is a powerful witness to the love and presence of God.

That's what Kevin and Mona Lee Feehan demonstrated during the celebration of World Marriage Day 2015 at St. Albert Church Feb. 8. The couple shared parts of their lives together to bring alive the theme of the celebration: Wherever You Go, I Will Go.

The Feehans have been married for 39 years but have been together for 45. They met at age 15. They have four married children and eight grandchildren. The Feehans have been offering marriage preparation classes and workshops for 35 years.

Marriage is a call to closeness, explained Kevin, a lawyer. "It's a call to experience oneness; it's a call to journey in another person's life. It's a call to be with another person in heart, in mind, in body and in soul."

Mona Lee said it begins with the marriage vows. "We promise to love each other in good times and in bad. That's a covenant and is a choice we made freely.

"I chose to follow Kevin wherever he would go. And Kevin chose to follow me wherever I would go. What an amazing covenant!"

Kevin said his choice to follow Mona Lee has been the right one.

"We travel a lot together. We have seen the world together. We've had moments of great celebration; we've had moments of great rejoicing. We've had moments of family. We have had moments of giftedness. It's been an abundance of laughter and joy in our lives."

However, 15 years ago during a sports competition Mona broke her leg and during the examination the doctor discovered she had cancer.

"Sometimes when you make a covenant to follow, you have to follow to dark places," Kevin said. "Today I have followed Mona Lee through 26 surgeries and half a dozen rounds of chemotherapy and weeks in bed. Those are tough times; they are not bad times."

Mona Lee said by supporting her through those hard times, Kevin helped her learn more about herself, more about marriage, more about their relationship, more about the world and more about God.

"He helped me to find courage. I learned how to let go. And I learned that not only we could grow and laugh together but we could cry together."

Mona Lee describes herself as "more of an introvert than extrovert." But in order to follow Kevin wherever he goes, she had to change. "I had to learn to live in an extroverted world."

Marrying Kevin meant following him into his chaotic, busy world. "I wanted quiet times. I wanted alone time. I wanted together time, but Kevin's career called me to step outside of my comfort zone."

Kevin said having Mona Lee share his busy life has been a godsend.

"She brings a sense of calmness, a sense of grounding, a sense of stability and a sense of peace that accompanies her wherever she goes. I learned how to navigate stormy waters with her beside me.

"I learned that no matter how busy I am, no matter how many boards and committees I sit on, the most important thing in my life is ending my day in the arms of my wife."

Mona Lee said she discovered that Kevin is God in her life. She didn't know that until one night Kevin walked in and, kneeling on the floor, asked his wife what was wrong. "I said, 'I don't know who God is in my life.'

"Kevin just took my face with his hands and said, 'You don't see God in this face?'"

Mona Lee was amazed. "It was an absolutely beautiful moment. When Kevin is the very best he can be for me he is the human face of God."

PRAYER TOGETHER

The Feehans said they pray together regularly. "In those times of despair (such as the cancer diagnosis), it's so powerful to have those moments of prayer together," Mona Lee said.

"God is in our marriage, in everything that we do," Kevin said. "He is with us in our good times and in our bad times. He travels with us and guides us; he helps us to be the best that we can be as a married couple.

"Whenever I follow Mona Lee, I follow God. Whenever Mona Lee follows me, she follows God. Whenever we go together, we go with God."